I Took the Summer Off and Not One Newsletter Did I Create!

IMG_2952This was not my intention, but low and behold, it was my reality! It has been a good summer, full of the many things I like most; celebration, relaxation, connection, being in nature and enjoying the life I have created for myself. I realize how much I enjoy connecting with you and sharing my musings on business, opportunities, and that which is top of my mind. Even though I haven’t written a word, I have been ruminating on the topic of this newsletter for a couple of months. Let me know what you think.

Back in June, a friend came for dinner and during the course of the meal she asked me how my life was going. I told her I felt a sense of ease and grace, more so than I can remember at any point in my adult life. I explained that I was really blessed to be feeling this way. She looked at me with surprise, pulled back and asked “How can you be feeling grace and ease when so many terrible things are happening in the world?” Her response surprised me, knocked me upside the head and I thought “Oh yes, she’s absolutely right about the state of the world, why am I not being dominated by sadness, despair and anger?”

Back in the day I was the one at the front of the march, the one leading the charge, the one with massive amounts of overt angst. I truly believed my actions and feelings were what identified me as a political activist, a seeker of social justice, someone on the “right” side of the fight. What has happened to me, I wondered? Have I lost my compassion and my commitment to changing the world? The long and the short of this conversation was that her inquiry pushed me to question my sense of well-being.

I responded to my dinner companion with some confusion, but also some certainty. I know that what is happening and how I feel is a good thing. Her question triggered me and for a moment I thought that maybe it was a bad thing. I heard concern in her voice that maybe I wasn’t the person she thought I was.

It turned out that my friend was specifically referring to the homophobic killings at the nightclub in Florida. Being that we are both lesbian feminists, she didn’t understand how I could not be as upset as she was by this horrible event. What I know to be true is that my anger, my rage, my fear, my upset could fuel me, but I’m no longer confident they’re moving me in the right direction. I’m starting to glean that transforming myself and supporting other people on a path of change is what it’s going to take for us to make a positive shift in the world.

I still have my feelings, my upset, my anger, and my sadness about terrorism, about the state of politics in this country and the world, about the many things I am deeply concerned about. What has shifted is I no longer think that hitting the streets and pounding my head against the wall of what I see as evil or bad is the solution. For most of my life I have been an activist. I am realizing that finding some peace, some ease, and some grace inside me pinpoints that I have shifted who I am in the world. And curiously enough, I do not feel less powerful! I feel more grounded, more centered, more connected and I’m a better listener. I’m more in touch with my feelings, I’m more aware of what is going on around me, and I am showing up as a more compassionate person.

Comments

  1. Greetings from Ohio! I’m bored to tears at work so I decided to check out your site on my iphone during lunch break.
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  2. Well put Cynthia. There is something to be said for feeling comfortable in our lives. Glad you took the summer off from your newsletter. I had missed it and am happy to see it back!

  3. Powerful as always. So glad for you that you took some time off. You were missed and am so happy you are back.

  4. Welcome Back. It’s very vitalizing to appreciate our journey w/o judgment and relish our capacity for more compassion during these challenging times. To be more grounded and centered is a true blessing!

  5. This is an awesome article and one that made me happy FOR you!
    I’ve had the opposite summer with the death of my father and the duties and y drama of helping my mother (little help from siblings, except to tell me how horrible I’m am) with the “paperwork” has left me feeling drained.

    I”m trying to counter that with seeing/reading being around positive things and your article was refreshing.
    thanks

    • Thank you for your words of encouragement. I hear you are having a rough time and my thoughts are with you as you traverse the challenges with your family. I know how hard it must be to not only lose a parent but then not be appreciated for your efforts. My recommendations are meditating and exercising. The combination seems to be a good mix for staying balanced and centered. Take good care!

  6. Dear Cynthia,
    I want to send you my heartfelt support for the shift you have experienced in cultivating your inner peace and well being. I too have found that this is truly the way to influence the world at large. I noticed that an emotional field emanates from each of us and affects others in profound and in more widely reaching ways than we can imagine. As I learn to manage my own emotional patterns from the past and maintain my emotional balance I start to notice that others are changing into more accepting and compassionate beings as well. I see that anger and rage over injustices merely creates more anger and rage, and the injustice continues.
    I agree with you that coming from a state of ease and grace is the most powerful tool we have to change the world into a place we would love to live in.
    Best wishes, Andrea

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